Giving Thanks for the French Bug

Looking back…

This post could easily have waited until New Years when we all look back at the year that has undoubtedly passed before we even had a chance to panic about all that lays in store for the coming year, but I found Thanksgiving to be as appropriate a time as any.

As I lay in relaxation pose on my yoga instructor’s creaky wood floor, fidgeting of course because my racing mind refuses to grant me a reprieve, I had one of my “wow I can’t believe this is my life” moments. Fleeting though they are, these moments arise unexpectedly from time to time. So as I lay listening to Amber breathing on the yoga mat next to me and telling myself that I should be letting my mind relax, I was instead hyper aware of my surroundings. I’m in Paris, the city where I’ve dreamed of living since I was in high school. How did this become a reality? I began to recall how unlikely it was at that time that I’d ever do anything with my French skills and even more unlikely that I would manage to find a way to live abroad.

My life before Paris seems so far away and foreign. The unhealthy and tumultuous relationships I let drag on now feel like they belong to someone else’s memory. I suppose this is the nature of the past but during these ephemeral waves of self-realization, I have a strangely intense sense of diconnection from this former life and yet, at the same time, undying gratitude for where it has led me. I see now that each choice, impulse, mistake, and challenge played an equally important role in my assiduous determination to create my own future.

Despite all of the obstacles, frustrations and periods of overwhelming anxiety, I had the courage to keep on trekking. And when I think of how my “French Bug” took form, I can’t help but think of Mademoiselle Schrader. I am unbelievably lucky to have ended up in her French class because not only was her accent impeccable (and therefore provided me with a model), but she gave me the encouragement I needed to pursue further French studies. It was on a trip to France in high school with my class that I knew I wouldn’t be happy in the States forever. So since Thanksgiving is a time for giving thanks, it seems fitting to send out an enormous thank you (into the void) to Julia Schrader (who is assuredly married and potentially sporting a different last name) for planting this seed.

Aside from the usual suspects, what are you thankful for this year?

Since I’ve been thinking a lot about the last year and what I’m thankful for, I asked my good friend, Amber – yes the same Amber who was resting peacefully at yoga on Monday while I was all over the place – what she was thankful for this year that differs from previous years.

“I’m thankful for being a foreigner in another country. I have now learned through personal experience the value of acceptance and, at the very least, tolerance. I believe this is a value we should all embrace for the sake of our communities and shared existence.

This year I’m exceptionally blessed by my family that includes my new [French] husband – a man I love beyond words.”

Share your thanks in the comment section!

I’d like to assemble a collection of reader thanks. Aside from being thankful for food and family, is there anything unique you’re thankful for this year?

Happy Thanksgiving to all!